Komal님의 프로필On Being a Mommy사진블로그리스트기타 도구 도움말

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    7월 24일

    Crazy kids!

    My kids are nuts.  Just so you know: my kids are nuts.  At least the little one is.
     
    Terrible 2's, my eye!!  This kid's been 3 for a couple of months, and she just gets crazier every day.  This new thing she does where she wants to run through parking lots is just scary!  What is WITH her?!  And then she laughs about it!  Like driving Mommy to a nervous breakdown is something to giggle about.  I have to hold on to that child's hand like... well, I don't know like what, but tight!
     
    They're not called nervous breakdowns anymore, are they?  Well, whatever they're called, I'm headed right for one.  Sigh.
     
    I don't think that I'll ever figure out this mommyhood thing!  Is there a single correct way to deal with the insanity and chaos that children bring?  Now what am I supposed to do with a 3-year-old who thinks that running away from Mommy in a parking lot is a fun game?  I've explained the dangers repeatedly, I've yelled, I've begged.... do I keep her in a stroller at all times?
     
    I think I'm gonna have to put my kid on a leash.
    8월 11일

    sleep

    what i dont get is this:  why do babies need so much help getting to sleep (and staying asleep)?  sonia used to do this too, and now alisha is doing it.  they just howl and howl and howl and howl and howl and-- well, u get it-- until they finally fall asleep.  and its not like im just letting them howl.  this is with constant rocking and bouncing and singing to and talking to...  still, half an hour at least.  i just dont get it.  i mean, its fine; they're babies-- crying is kinda part of the job description.  and i keep telling alisha (like i used to tell her sister), "okay, ure sleepy.  i get it.  so go to sleep!  whos stopping you?".

    apparently they no understanding so good when they small. 

    thank God alisha is a good kid who really doesnt cry unless shes sleepy.  or hungry.  or... no, thats it.  so im not exactly complaining... not really.  im just trying to understand why getting urself to sleep is something u have to work so hard to learn.  eh, whatever.  just doing my normal rant here. :)  hope everyone has a great weekend.  keep smiling!  :)

    im off for another cup of coffee... 

    3월 13일

    mommyhood's benefits

    so i hope im not messing with babyzone.com's copyrights here, but this was cute and i had to share.  i found it at babyzone (<-- click to go to site).

    -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

     

     

    The Unexpected Benefits of Being a Mom

    By Kathy P. Behan
    As we all know, there are many ups and downs of motherhood. Chances are, you can probably rattle off a lot of each in a flash; however, there are probably some unexpected benefits you may not have considered. Here's a list of some of my favorites.
     

    As we all know, there are many ups and downs of motherhood. Chances are, you can probably rattle off a lot of each in a flash; however, there are probably some unexpected benefits you may not have considered. Here's a list of some of my favorites.

     

    "Auto-rock." What do you do while you're standing in line with a small child in your arms? Bingo! The obligatory parental sway. I find that even if I'm alone, I catch myself rhythmically rocking back and forth. This swaying motion is not only soothing to small semi-savage beasts, but it's good exercise as well.

     

    Extrasensory hearing. Even in a large gathering, most mothers cannot only hone in on their child's crying, but they can also determine the exact nature of the wail. They can tell if the child is: (a) frustrated, (b) annoyed, (c) tired, or (d) has just been smashed by little, though highly-aggressive, cousin Max.

     

    An acceptance of, and even a welcoming of bodily functions. Soon after becoming a mother, my older sister found herself patting a business associate's back and exclaiming, "Good for you!" after he inadvertently burped during a business lunch. Mothers are also highly skilled toilet-training cheerleaders. They enthusiastically encourage their children to "perform" on the potty.

     

    Strong stomach. After changing a zillion diapers, wiping countless runny noses, and cleaning up after a host of stomach bugs, a mom gets tough. For instance, her appetite is barely diminished even after her youngster weaves through a crowd to find her and deposit a piece of regurgitated chicken into her hand.

     

    "MD" - Mother's Diagnosis. Moms have the uncanny knack of being able to tell if their children are sick just by looking at them. Even more remarkable, a mom can determine whether her offspring has a fever simply by looking into his eyes.

     

    Perform multiple tasks simultaneously. This is where moms really shine. As a matter of fact, I don't think I know any mothers who only tackle one job at a time. On any given day, the moms of America are able to cook dinner, set the table, answer the phone, referee arguments, review the following day's schedule, make lunches, and clean up, all at once, without missing a beat.

     

    Magical kisses. Mothers have the power to take the sting out of physical and psychological bruises with just a kiss. These aren't ordinary kisses though. They contain a soothing combination of love, support, and understanding.

     

    Awakens instantly. Unlike fathers, who tend to be incoherent for a full 15 minutes after being awakened from a sound sleep, and then stammer inanities like, "I'm up, I'm up." Mothers are alert as soon as they're roused. They can quickly ascertain who's upset, what the problem is, and what to do about it, long before the average father has even figured out where he is.

     

    Large love capacity. Contrary to mathematical principles, the more children you have, the more love there is to go around. A mom never runs out, she has plenty for everyone. Plus, each child is her favorite. She cares for them all equally, but differently. And the love she has for her children is unconditional and everlasting.

     

    About the Author
    Kathy Behan, a mother of three, is a freelance writer specializing in family and health issues. She has written for numerous national publications and lives in the Boston area.
    All articles by Kathy P. Behan
    2월 20일

    people without kids

    so i went to a dinner party a while back, and i met this woman.  she asked me how many kids i had and i told her just the one so far, but the second was on the way, God willing.  then i asked her if she was planning to have any kids in the near future (i had already seen that she didnt have any with her at the party).  she smiled and said-- very lightheartedly-- that she had been married 10 years and there were no kids yet, so... no, not in the near future.
     
    well, much as she tried to say this with a smile, i saw the shadow that passed behind her eyes.  there was real pain there.  i passed over the subject with a smile, too,  and a joke about her having a clean, peaceful house, and then we talked about something else.  but it broke my heart to see that cloud come over her face, however briefly.
     
    we know so many wonderful, loving couples who would make such fantastic parents... and yet they cant seem to have kids.  its just... i cant imagine that heartbreak.  to obviously want children and then not be able to have them.  its horrible.  i cant imagine my life without kids-- i dont even want to try to!
     
    and then there r so many people out there who have been blessed with wonderful children... and yet they cant seem to appreciate those children!  i just dont get it!  how do u neglect or even abuse a child?  once u have a baby, how can ur whole world not revolve around that tiny person?!
     
    it seems so unfair, really.  but i have to believe that God, in His infinite wisdom, has His reasons.  i realize that both situations-- having children or not having them-- r tests of ur character and strength of faith.  i know that the people who wanted children and were unable to have them will be ultimately compensated for the pain they suffered and the people who didnt appreciate their children will be punished for not recognizing the incredible blessing they were given.  i pray for the peace of mind and heart of the first group, and for wisdom for the second.  Ameen.
                                  
     
    11월 15일

    trade 'em for beans!

    and of course, now shes gotten into the recycling box and is happily ripping up every piece of paper in the house.
     
    so let me tell u about mommyhood, for those of u about to have or those who have just had kids.  there r days, mommies, when u think u would happily trade ur kid for a can of beans.  no joke.  they make u crazy, especially when theyre new.  when my daughter was born i told my dad (who lives overseas) that i was shipping her to him and that id pick her up in time for preschool.  and i threatened her on a regular basis ("u stop crying this minute or mommy's dumping u out that window and the squirrels can entertain u!!").  course, that really wasnt too much of a threat since our apartment was kinda in the basement of the building and the windows were at ground level.  in any case, she never seemed bothered by the thought-- maybe she thought the squirrels looked fun.
     
    but my point is this:  its okay.  honest.  u will realize that the good will eventually outweigh the bad.  i say eventually because it can be hard to find something great about a howling, colicy 2-month old.  well, except that theyre really adorable... when theyre not screaming.  if u feel like ure gonna have a nervous breakdown, thats normal, too.  talk to someone.  anyone.  me, i'll listen.  it gets better, though.  the bond will grow and keep growing, and soon u wont know what u ever did without them.  well, except sleep-- ure giving that up for a while.  but thats worth it when u get to watch a darling little person sleeping instead.
     
    what i guess im trying to say is that u love ur child.  u do.  unconditionally.  but u dont always have to (and u wont always) like them very much.  but as long as u know that u want them much more than u do that can of beans, ure fine.
                                                 
    9월 22일

    why?

    what possesses us to have kids?  what insanity has us in its grip?  what crazy biology makes us do it?
     
    dont get me wrong-- having kids is great.  but really, what were we thinking?!  is it that we really dont realize what we're getting ourselves into?  alright, then, going with that theory:  y do so many people have more than one kid?  i mean, u know what ure setting urself up for by then, right?
     
    seriously.  y do we sign ourselves up for:
         being knee-deep in smelly diapers for at least 2 years at a time
         giving up our sleep for several years
         popping right back up to warm a bottle and feed the kid just as soon as we
           fall asleep
         cleaning up spilled food from where its stuck in our carpet
         doing loads of laundry that smells either like sour milk or... well, pee
         coaxing food (or gum or candy) out of hair-- ours, the kids
         listening to hours and hours of all the musical toys with the annoying
           sounds
         memorizing every episode of sesame street
         having a kid howl at us every time we take it to the grocery store
         having a kid howl at us every time we take it almost anywhere, for that
           matter
         putting up with crankiness from a little person for no apparent reason
         taking attitude for someone less than half our size
         getting peed on, pooped on, and thrown up on
         getting beat up and head-butted regulary by a tiny thing who thinks it's
           hilarious and doesnt know any better when rough-housing and playing
           with u
         all the drama that goes with a haircut, nail clipping, change of clothes, or
           a diaper change
         always being terrified that ull do something wrong or mess up
     
    and im sure that list just goes on and on and on, but i really dont have the energy to get into it all right now (see the second thing up there about lack of sleep).
     
    of course, i have a theory,  because thats what i do.  (waaaayy too much time on my hands, it seems)  i think we think that the rewards outweigh the...  well, the other stuff.  and u know what?  we're not wrong.  nope.  i think we have our kids because all the craziness is made up for by:
         having a soft, warm little person to cuddle with
         seeing part of urself in someone so cute! (there must be something good
           about me too, right?)
         those adorable little baby bottoms that almost make the diapers worth it :)
         being able to kiss those soft little cheeks that ur lips just sink into
         seeing those first little smiles
         hearing those sweet little giggles-- which is obviously the most beautiful
           sound in the world
         getting to be as silly as u want to see that smile or hear that giggle
         watching a little person learn and grow into a not-so-little one
         knowing u can comfort with just a smile and a hug
         the sense of wonder that comes with each new skill ur child learns
         the sense of accomplishment for u when u help ur child learn that new
           skill or word
         having a small child come to u with open arms, saying "ug, ug, ug" ("hug,
           hug, hug")
         seeing how perfectly that little hand fits in urs
         knowing that someone (besides ur parents) is thrilled just because u exist
         knowing that ure needed and loved unconditionally, because ure mommy :)
     
    and that list goes on and on, too, but again with the sleep thing.    please feel free to leave a comment and add to both lists.  im off for now, having poured out my thoughts for the day.  keep smiling, all.
    9월 20일

    advice

    ugh!  it gets so confusing!  everyone has a different story of what worked for them and their kids.  and dont get me wrong, im very grateful for all the advice i get-- most of it is very good.  its just very confusing, is all.
     
    like ur doctor or nurse practitioner will tell u one thing, and ur friends will say, "no,no, that never works.  the doctors always tell u to do that, but this is what u should really do...".  well, then u ask ur doctor or nurse again and they say, "no, new moms tend to do that, but its wrong.  what u need to do thats best for ur child is..."
     
    its just a big ol' vicious cycle!
     
    and so here it is, moms-- the secret to mommyhood as i understand it:  u do what works for u and ur kids.  thats it; its that simple.  of course, u should never dismiss any sincere advice right out of hand, and never ur doctors (especially in health matters).  but ultimately u have to make decisions that work for u.  listen to the voices of experience (doctors, parents, friends with kids), and do what works then.  as long as ur doctor says that ur kids r good and healthy, ure doing great.
    9월 10일

    new mommyhood

    i found this article on msn today about how nobody talks about what the very first weeks of motherhood are really  like.  theyre tougher than we all let on!
     
    so anyone out there expecting a baby who wants someone to be brutally honest with them, click here.
     
    and just so u know, its not all bad, even in those first few crazy weeks.   before u know it, u and that little person have bonded and you wouldnt trade motherhood for anything in the world!  i hope that all new mommies have someone they can talk to and share their experiences with.  whether u do or not, im always here to listen.
                                                                         
    8월 11일

    being a mommy means...

    again, not sure where this came from, but i think parents.com:

     

    Being a Mommy Means...

    Understanding when to cut the crust off a sandwich
    Having the power to scare monsters from under the bed
    Reading the same bedtime story over and over
    Finding room on the fridge for just one more piece of artwork
    Sneaking in late to work because you got an extra morning hug
    Spending every Saturday at a birthday party
    Never crying over spilled milk...or juice...
    Picking out your child's sobs in a crowded playground
    Getting out of bed in the middle of the night to see if he's breathing
    Wearing too many hats to count
    Keeping everyone's schedules straight
    Being able to banish boo-boos with magic kisses
    Baking birthday cupcakes for the whole class the night before
    Knowing that you'd never trade any of it, for anything.

    7월 18일

    before i was a mom

    i have no idea where it originally came from, but someone sent me this in an email last month, and i kept it because it was all so true.  i just found it again and decided to put it up here. 

     

    Before I was a Mom -

    I slept as long as I wanted and never worried about how late I Got into
    bed. I brushed my hair and my teeth....everyday....sometimes twice! I had
    complete control of my mind and my thoughts. I went to the bathroom
    alone...without little fists knocking to be let in.

    Before I was a Mom - I slept all night. I ate what I wanted, when I
    wanted...while it was still hot. I never went without, so someone else
    would not. I never knew that I could love someone so much.

    Before I was a Mom - I cleaned my house each day. I never tripped over toys
    or forgot words to a lullaby. I didn't worry whether or not my plants were
    poisonous. I never thought about immunizations.

    Before I was a Mom - I had never been puked on......Pooped on. Spit on.
    Chewed on. Peed on. I never used my own saliva to wipe chocolate smudged
    cheeks. I never cleaned a fallen pacifier with my own spit. I never got
    deliriously happy over a simple grin.


    Before I was a Mom -

    I never held down a screaming child so that doctors could do tests....Or
    give shots. I never looked into teary eyes and cried. I never sat up late
    hours at night watching a baby sleep. I never worried all night long,
    praying that everything would be OK.


    Before I was a Mom -

    I had never gotten up in the middle of the night every 10 minutes to make
    sure that all was okay. I never held a sleeping baby just because I didn't
    want to put it down. I never felt my heart break into a million pieces when
    I couldn't stop the hurt...or fix the problem. I never knew I would love
    being a Mom.


    Before I was a Mom -

    I didn't know the feeling of having my heart outside my body. I didn't know
    how special it could feel to feed a hungry baby. I didn't know that bond
    between a mother and her child. I didn't know that something so small could
    make me feel so important and happy. I never knew that someone so little
    could affect my life so much.


    Before I was a Mom -

    I had never known the warmth, the love, the heartache, the wonderment or
    the satisfaction of being a Mom. I didn't know I was capable of feeling so
    much before I was a Mom.